B reports to police as theft. My conclusion is that there is the implication here that women deserve certain advantages over men. Hello, yes I did wonder myself ., however, it was stated by A to B whilst already in a relationship. Neither is true. ” This is very new area of study. No charges against her because she claimed PPD whoch was a lie. Better access to advice for litigants in person; recognition that mediation is not the cure all for situations where there is an imbalance of power. The fact that financial arrangements are chased by the state but contact arrangements are not, seems to me to imply that the state may consider money more important than contact. I think a big problem is that there is infact an instatutionalised discrimination within the system that breaches the Equality Act 2010. Particularly, it will upset a man if he finds out she has been criticising him to her friends and will feel shame and humiliation on a grand scale if she does it in his presence. But the point I am trying to make is that when two adults get together to make a baby this is a really serious thing. I recall a case when the dad was accused of not paying a maintenance payment which he had indeed paid into mum’s account. The issue of parental access for fathers is just one example of bias. I accept there are failings in the system but ‘the system’ does not cause adult relationships to break down and ‘the system’ cannot be the glue that mends those relationships. you really do not understand about the separation of powers do you? Your remaining more general points about our culture and men’s general willingness to get stuck in and do nappies, etc rings true of course, although I am talking about those who want to – and I accept that separation can push people into wanting things they never used to want! a child is removed unnecessarily just because the LA will not finance a less-invasive alternative, the decision will be instantly appealable. Are we to conclude that British men are worse fathers or that there is something else going on? Despite the fact that the other parent has been supporting children in items of clothING and haircuts.. they just won’t listen to you whatsoever and then start taking automatic payments out of your wages and destroying your way to live. Really? If only ones lawyers would face falsehoods head-on and bring falsehoods to book. I agree that anger is a factor but also that fear and misery often manifest themselves as anger. I understand. Lawyers cannot DEMAND money. I was very concerned for example, to hear at the conference on Saturday that Dr Sue Whitcombe was alarmed by the bias she perceived from such agencies as CAFCASS, against fathers. My view, as an ordinary parent bearing in mind the separation of powers and other principles , is that should the young girl in question and other damaged children need money spending on their care especially medical care then it is the duty of the authorities to supply it . Thousands of children each year are still being denied time with both parents due to failings in the system The position with me is slightly different ; I have seen both sides of the system and I have seen the best and the worse of SW’s. & don’t bother trying to make it the fault of the LA or any of the professionals involved, likely to be NHS as it happens; CAMHS etc. I would not have to decide ,mainly on the hearsay evidence of largely female SW’s and the various opposing allegations and counter allegations from opposing parents. Thus our attempts to be constructive go nowhere. http://www.childrenssociety.org.uk/news-and-blogs/press-releases/nine-homes-by-the-age-of-nine-%E2%80%93-housing-instability-marks-lives-of#163961_20170330102705, https://twitter.com/gardencourtlaw/status/894607459276513281, Taking the redpill and washing it down with some cool-aid – Cubicgarden.com…, Address by McFarlane LJ to Families Need Fathers | Child Protection Resource, https://childprotectionresource.online/why-does-everyone-hate-the-family-courts-and-what-if-anything-can-we-do-about-it/, https://www.writersrepublic.com/bookshop/dont-date-crazy-phil-am-dream-runs-american-system. However, I must agree with Helen that with some individuals it is not possible. Thats an utterly and blindingly sexist nieve and inaccurate thing to say. He needs to be reformed . There is specific and calculated gender bias in the family Courts system, to say otherwise is to say that the hundreds of thousands of men stating it are wrong and you alone are right which would only lead to stereotypical assertations that inherently lead to a bias conclusion. World view, my eye! The problem is that the smallest emanation of annoyance or anxiety such as a change of intonation in ones voice can too easily tip the scales in a family court which is already against you .It’s not fair but its just the way it is,i’m afraid. I think the Court should follow the law and due procedure meticulously. This must amount to bias. It is great to see your opinions. Procedures must be enforced tightly to ensure decisions are proportionate and in order to correct ‘wrong’ ones, automatic permission to appeal serious cases should be mandatory. One wonders whether child-protection concerns related to dysfunctional behaviours like these ( common in families) have shown an increase since the age of consent was reduced from twenty-one to eighteen and then down to sixteen.Was that a mistake? If you can’t make a point without insulting someone, I doubt you have much of a point to make. While we have this ridiculous attitude that violent men must be appeased and contained, we will continue to have problems. Dear Sarah, Thanks for your time and thanks for this thread. Sounds kinda totalitarian to me. No. Can I ask Fact-seeker what you propose to do with your Research Dissertation when you finish it? Having a Twitter spat can be entertaining for a brief moment but its utterly futile if all it achieves is people shouting at one another across the electronic abyss. It was said that people were unaffected by alcohol and it was safe to drive up to that line. Sorry,Sarah. The non-resident parents face a fait-accomplish which is bound to affect judgments. If a social worker tells a lie about a mental health problem, that is easily disproved by getting medical records to court. When it was first brought in ,lawyers and medical experts examined research etc. Police arrest B. The judge was a rather senior old buffer in the wilds of Yorkshire, but he had clearly made up his mind about what he was going to do and was not interested in evidence. One of the issues I have is the lack of early intervention which would be ‘invest to save’ as they say. When matters are of political significance ,it is very awkward for professionals to be upfront and they are often scared to say anything which may be considered not to be p.c. Sometimes these men just cannot help themselves, they are human-beings. I apologise if I misinterpreted the President’s meaning. I mentioned earlier that I read somewhere that the great majority of the time in the UK, the child resides with the mother. What’s working? That said, a decade down the line, I hear of bias against fathers. To reply to Charl’s comment by ‘blaming’ one gender for the creation of a child is exactly where our gender bias lies. Clearly you were hurting at the time, that is when NOT TO WRITE STUFF. Entering the work place more employment oppertunities ect. It’s because dad brings home the bacon… Indeed it is quite absurd to suggest it. sorry, I have no experience of the US court system so i can’t usefully comment. “How Are Family Law Judges Chosen In California?” For most people, family law procedure can be confusing. Completely inappropriate on every level. Pingback: Sarah Phillimore: are family courts biased? As I’m sure any woman would also. ). He can not see his children and at the same time he is expected to pay generous sums of child support. And that is what needs to happen to improve support services. On this subject, I suggest that factseeker’s comments and those of any man should be valued by all readers especially mothers. She was never required to pay child support. Thank God the President understands that and as a result the youngster at issue has now been placed in accordance with her paramount interests (always my mantra) rather than what the professionals regard as her kbest interests. If a father has parental responsibility and there is no court order in place preventing him, then there is nothing inherently ‘unlawful’ in turning up at school and taking your child; In my experience in the South West, the police are highly unlikely to act if a child is with a parent who has parental responsibility, provided no court order is breached and they are satisfied that the child is safe and well; HOWEVER the police will act to prevent the commission of a crime and to maintain public order. I suggest you start by reading the 12 working papers published by one of the worlds leading institutions on child development. The person that said why they have so many security officers is right.. Parents should spend their money on mediation by barristers and come to an agreement , recognise facts and faults etc. Rant over … maybe. I took her to court 2 additional times just for the female judge to tell her she is required to pay the support, I now get the payment from the state but the state still hasn’t gone after her, she has been engaged to another man that she lives with for 4 years now and yet still lives off of me while I struggle to raise our daughter. His mother moved house and changed her email and phone. The overwhelming fact that most fathers take their parental responsibility, poo and all is greatly undermined by the stereotypical comment too frequently made here and stated as fact rather than perception. Thank you very much. A Parent’s View Perhaps co-parenting after divorce just simply does not work. She will unless in extreme cases be allowed to keep the children with her whilst investigations are ongoing. I hear exactly the same from women. No matter how intelligent, happy and reasonable we may think we are when we go in to the Family Court setting , we may come out angry, upset and unreasonable .I agree with that completely. If there is something you want to say, say it directly. Dont YOU DARE make this about ‘lawyers’. How do others challenge it? Anyone who cannot see the sexism in the court system either has their head up their ass or is completely insane. Whilst the blame cannot lie with any one part of the system, is it not true that the system has been given the responsibility for taking action which will improve those outcomes? On brief facts alone! Charl made a very prominent point about specific genders being made to, or not made to take responsibility for creating a child. Courts are third parties making decisions for the entire family when the parents are unable to make decisions themselves. Maximum happiness with flawed material, if you like. ( I wonder if many women are prone to let it go at first in the false hope that he will change, perhaps Sam could comment). Your post gives the other side of that coin; I would like to write something and refer to it, probably by quoting in full. It is inevitable. However all these have been shattered at the unclean hands of the legal system. Friends would often buy me food during this time. For e.g. The work I have been doing collecting this data over the past 4 years has made me both very angry and sad that there is so much denial about the consequences of neglectful or emotionally abusive parenting. I suppose someone will be saying I am in collusion with John Hemming, Ian thingummyjig and their cronies. Two moleststion orders, no admissions, occupation order, not one atom of evidence delineated. Thanks for your reply Sarah. Therefore we should listen carefully to what men have to say. B didn’t know where A was living. the point I made at the conference I will repeat; for every father devastated by the denial of a relationship with his child, there is a mother who is lonely and afraid, desperate for the the father to step up and take responsibility but having no legal mechanism to ‘force him’. It is a massive part of the problem that access to justice is becoming unaffordable for many, I agree. I have found working paper 3 (‘Excessive Stress Disrupts the Architecture of the Brain’) working paper 5 (‘The Timing and Quality of Early Life Experiences Combine to Shape Brain Architecture’) working paper 10 ( ‘Early Experiences Can Alter Gene Expression and Affect Long-term Development’) particularly helpful, but all 12 are useful for a deeper understanding of this area. Men and women can behave with staggering cruelty and indifference towards one another and the lives they are both responsible for creating. Many thanks Fact-Seeeker What I think you are saying is that the family court is pragmatic and that there is no intentional bias. As far as the LA ‘s are concerned , if they hold parental responsibility for a child ,then i think it is not unreasonable to put some of the fault at its door. Why not try appealing one such wrong decision and rescuing the child from an inhumane fate? Violence is wrong. Never lawyers or police. There is of a lack of awareness of domestic abuse , both in the wider society and in state departments who supposedly protect children. Sarah, you are implying that it’s okay for the court system to arrange the law around some generalizations about how men are. for example Lucy Reed’s plea on Pink Tape. He lost his job and was threatened with jail time for being in contempt of a court order by not paying child support. I understand the pain of abandonment however a hostile and toxic ex partner will frustrate all contact with the children and go the extreme of false allegations to destroy ones relationships or indeed their whole life. But if you go down the path, in high conflict situations, of insisting on YOUR rights being exercised in face of opposition from the other parent, I can predict with near absolute certainty that your future looks bleak, in terms of any hope for resolving your difficulties and co-parenting in harmony. court buildings are poorly designed and don’t help parents talk to one another at court or feel comfortable in the court room; tensions remain high, The government has removed legal aid from private law cases and created a situation where mothers are encouraged to make allegations of violence against fathers to secure funding. This approach is costly and time consuming but it can determine more likely who is biased … This is not justice. The process of family law is biased—against the family itself. States receive funding from the federal title 4d funding. I am guessing that you, Sarah are one of those ladies ( or women if you prefer it) that got married after comparatively, recent alterations to marriage vows. Like a fool I returned to the home with a view to reconcile. The important point is that whilst we don’t all agree 100%, we do all agree that the POSSIBILITY of bias exists. My ex was awarded half my pension, despite the court agreeing she didn’t contribute to my career. B sought help for A on many occasions, but A refused to acknowledge any issues. When inhumanity occurs ,it is due to false ideology, arrogance and dogma on the part of the perpetrators and that includes Guardians. In many divorce cases the man would say to me – why should she get any money. I would suggest you read up as much as you can about this new area. I think we just don’t talk enough about this and it causes great pain. 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